At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Randomize