we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
