I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
We're too hungover to prance.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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