i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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