Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
