Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize