dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
