we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Randomize
