Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
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