No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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