No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
