ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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