I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Randomize