it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
