you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Randomize
