DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Randomize
