apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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