I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
