We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Randomize