hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Its about making memories worth repressing
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Randomize
