I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
