Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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