people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
Randomize
