that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize