bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
