I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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