Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize
