Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
