How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
she peed on how many people?
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
