I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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