well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Randomize
