Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
