Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
