Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
We're using joints as your birthday candles
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
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