I don't think brook has ever known best
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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