420 ftw
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Randomize
