Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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