I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
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