fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
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