I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
We talked him into tasing himself.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Randomize
