Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
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