what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Randomize