walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Randomize