went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
