Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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