you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
