dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
