...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize