is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Randomize