Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
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