shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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